168. Women, Love, and Kindness – The History, Science, and Strategy of Giving.

[00:00:03] Welcome to episode 168, which is a Girl Take the Lead soundbite. The soundbite is a shorter episode that may be a bit more about a topic we've covered like our episode today or a quick inspiration. And I'm your host, Yolanda Canny.

[00:00:19] After our previous episode with Heather McLeod Grant about philanthropy in women, I thought you might like a bit more about the topic. I also thought we could build on our episode 56, which was about love and kindness because perhaps at the heart of philanthropy is kindness and love.

[00:00:42] Let's start at what we know about the history of women supporting charitable causes. And as usual, I'll have all my sources and some episodes for your reference in the show notes for you. So women in America have a centuries long history of supporting charitable causes

[00:01:06] and perhaps by understanding the role of gender in historical philanthropic behaviors, it can help us as women reach our own potential as leaders and givers today. The history of female philanthropists started in parochial institutions during the colonial era where nuns, deaconesses and women of all face

[00:01:33] provided charitable services to marginalized communities, according to the Gales Women's Study Archive. These early efforts to aid the poor and sick inspired the creation of contemporary religious groups like the Hospital Sisters Health System, Sisters of Mercy and Sisters of Charity.

[00:01:57] Women were pioneer givers of food, shelter, clothing, health care and education because they immediately responded to social needs. An example is when Anne Redcliffe financially supported the first scholarship fund at Harvard University in the 1600s. In 1809, black female members of the African Union Society created

[00:02:27] the African Female Benevolent Society in Rhode Island to provide clothing and education to black children as governmental resources were controlled by white Americans. In 1881, Clara Barton founded the American Red Cross with the goal of providing nursing care and support to soldiers during the Civil War.

[00:02:55] Jane Adams and Ellen Gates Starr established the Hall House in Chicago's industrial poor West side to provide social and educational opportunities for working class people in 1889. In 1909, Nanny Helen Burroughs founded the National Training School for Women and Girls in Washington D.C. to provide vocational training for women

[00:03:26] who had no access to education. And Helen Keller, you may know, co-founded the American Foundation for Overseas Blind to assist World War II veterans who were blinded in combat in 1915. These are just a few examples from American history

[00:03:50] and perhaps these women can inspire us to do our own kind of giving. Women are more likely to be involved in philanthropy than men in many ways, including donating money, volunteering and engaging in pro-social behavior. And consistent with the metric Heather offered us,

[00:04:15] research from the Women's Philanthropy Institute, the WPI, shows that women are 40 percent more likely to donate than men and that households led by women give more money regardless of income or wealth. Women may also be more generous as they age.

[00:04:38] The WPI studies also show that women volunteer more than men. Women are more likely to engage in pro-social behavior such as donating to charities and performing simple acts of kindness. Women are more likely to involve their children in decisions about which charities to fund,

[00:05:03] which can help create long term support for organizations and a more altruistic next generation. Women may also lead and support causes by inviting friends and colleagues to their homes to learn about the charity's work. Kind of like the giving circle we discussed in our last episode.

[00:05:25] In a lot of our episodes, we've covered what happens to the brain when it comes to emotions. And science says random acts of kindness are good for our health. That warm feeling of well-being that washes over us when we've done something kind isn't just in our head.

[00:05:46] It's in our brain chemicals too. Acts of kindness can release hormones that contribute to our mood and overall well-being. So kindness is chemical. Most research on the science behind why kindness makes us feel better has centered around oxytocin, sometimes called the love hormone.

[00:06:11] Oxytocin plays a role in forming social bonds and trusting other people. It's the hormone we mothers produce when we breastfed. Oxytocin is also released when we're physically intimate. It's tied to making us more trusting, more generous and friendlier while also lowering our blood pressure.

[00:06:35] Acts of kindness can also give our love hormone level a boost. Studies have also linked random acts of kindness to releasing dopamine a chemical messenger in the brain that gives us a feeling of euphoria. It's a feel good brain chemical. And in addition to boosting oxytocin and dopamine,

[00:06:59] being kind can also increase serotonin, a neurotransmitter that helps regulate mood. So I got to tell you when I first started to think about this episode I wanted to do something to focus on the brain. I wanted to do something to follow Heather's.

[00:07:18] And I thought I might be going down the road of just talking about some female mega donors that she mentioned. And then I asked myself, I wonder if the thought that women give less than men was true.

[00:07:32] And as I read articles, I saw that clearly when it comes to mega donors, most are men, but that's only one dimension of giving, right? There are so many other ways to give and be kind. And if we look at things that way,

[00:07:47] we can see the history of giving and kindness. Women are right in there. After coming to that, I was on a pink cloud all day, no doubt filled with oxytocin and dopamine. So kindness also helps reduce stress and improve our emotional well being.

[00:08:04] It can also create a sense of belonging and reduce isolation, especially when we volunteer with others. It helps to keep things in perspective. Many of us don't realize that an impact of different perspective can have on the outlook of our own life.

[00:08:21] There is some evidence that being aware of our own acts of kindness as well as the things we are grateful for can increase feelings of happiness, optimism and satisfaction. Research also says that when we're grateful, our brains release those same feel good chemicals, dopamine and serotonin.

[00:08:41] Gratitude can activate multiple brain regions, including the anterior cingulate cortex, medial frontal cortex and hypothalamus. The anterior cingulate cortex and medial frontal cortex are associated with reward, empathy, social and moral cognition and value judgment. The hypothalamus can affect metabolism, stress and various behaviors.

[00:09:10] Gratitude can also regulate cortisol production in the brain, which can help reduce stress and anxiety. Doing good may help us have a more positive outlook about our own circumstances. They can boost our feelings of confidence, being in control, happiness and optimism.

[00:09:31] They may also encourage others to repeat the good deeds they've experienced themselves. Contributing to a more positive community, the benefits of helping others can last long after the act itself for those who offer kindness and those who benefit. This in turn can improve our own self-esteem.

[00:09:55] Although acts of kindness for other people can make us feel good, we need to also keep in mind why we're doing it and remember that it's for their benefit, not ours. But we need to remember not to overdo it. We can set boundaries and remember self-care.

[00:10:16] This was nicely said in one of the articles I found. If we find we are giving too much of ourselves, or have gone beyond our means, it's probably time to take a step back. It's very easy to give away all of our energy,

[00:10:34] especially if we are finding things hard ourselves and want to focus on others. Leave enough for yourself. Kindness has to start with yourself." Heather challenged us to think about our own strategy when it comes to philanthropy. So take a moment right now. What do you care about?

[00:10:58] What hits the core with you? You may remember from that episode that I shared that I deeply care about the first-generation college students and want to support their efforts by helping them afford their books. So I continue to talk with San Jose State University

[00:11:14] to see how I might do this. One fundraiser is a great help for us One fundraiser I can see is combining my passion for card-making, experience with product marketing and leveraging the voice we've created together on this podcast to sell products. My goal is to have my store

[00:11:36] to do this up by the end of this month of June. So dear listeners, you are all holding the space for me to do this and proceeds will go to fund my efforts with San Jose University and other nonprofits that you've heard about on this show.

[00:11:53] And I gotta say, I see my recording this podcast and you're listening as acts of kindness. Some of you have been there since the beginning and I love you for it. Thank you. And there are so many different ways we can be philanthropic, right?

[00:12:11] And one idea is, of course, to start small and maybe donate a small amount of money to a charity close to your heart like I'm going to volunteer is another great way to look at opportunities to be kind that will begin maybe at home, at work,

[00:12:31] around in the public or on social media. Oh yeah. That's a good one. That's a great place to be kind. And let's be kind to ourselves as well. Whatever you can manage today is good enough. Enjoy and celebrate that. And if things are hard for you right now,

[00:12:52] try and find some small thing to celebrate each day like getting up, washing your hair, washing, giving the dogs a bath. It can just be that kind of achievement. It doesn't need to be a 5K run on Instagram. Try to tune out the voice of judgment and comparison

[00:13:16] and tune in to the voice that says, we are enough. I was on a call recently with my podcast squad and some of us seem to all be going down the same path of just not right now. What's that about? You might ask.

[00:13:35] Well, each of us had some goals that we were reassessing and rather than push and drive to reach them, it was kind of like we were taking a sidestep and just saying to ourselves, just not right now. Isn't that a great way to surrender and let go?

[00:13:56] Right. And maybe even renegotiate a promise. That's something we can easily forget to do. We can let go of our ego or someone else's voice. They're judgment telling us to achieve or do something and listen to our own intuition and let that guide us.

[00:14:17] And that's a true act of kindness to ourselves for sure. And on that note, dear friends, we'll end our episode today. Thanks for being here. Thank you for listening today and we sure hope you enjoy it. If you enjoyed this episode, if you didn't, please leave a comment

[00:14:35] wherever you listen to your podcasts. Tell a friend about us. Join our public Facebook group, Girl Take the Lead, or visit our website, girltaketheleadpod.com. We also have a YouTube channel where your subscription would be appreciated. Once you're on YouTube, search at Girl Take the Lead

[00:14:55] and we're on YouTube Music, where you can see a video of this episode. Our next episode will feature our very special guest, Soparna Vashisht. Soparna is passionate about driving social change in the areas of sustainability, conservation, gender equality and mental well-being.

[00:15:16] She's a founder of Women Back to Work, an initiative that helps create systemic pathways for women wanting to re-enter the workforce. For the last 20 years, she has worked for conservation nonprofits in the areas of strategy, communication and development.

[00:15:35] So keeping with our theme this month about kindness, Soparna will help us learn about some fabulous nonprofits that are doing really great acts of kindness to sustain the planet and the animals in it. Please join us again for that episode and talk to you soon. Bye.